Learn How to Let Go

Breathe and let go…

 

This is what I was saying to a client during one of his Kinesiology sessions. He was so confused about how to let go, that he made himself MORE stressed by analyzing it.

He said to me – “My friends go to yoga, and the yoga instructor repeatedly says to us to breathe and let go, and I’m breathing fine because I know how to do that, but I don’t know EXACTLY how or what I am trying to let go of!!”

“My friends feel so clear headed, and centered at the end of a session, and I am well, you can guess – confused.”

Letting go is not a thinking process.

It is a feeling process.

How can you let go and feel calm and relaxed, if your mind is in over drive?

We think from the moment we wake up, to the moment we put our head on the pillow at night, and even then our mind is still ticking over.

During our thought processes, we are triggering emotions that creates a feeling inside of us, which we either hold onto, or let go of.

Feelings are products of our emotions. Emotions tell us what we like or dislike, and our feelings tell us how to live.

For example: If we are living day by day triggering the emotions of fear, then we begin to live in a state of worry (feeling) day in day out.

This constant worry shapes the way we live our life, stopping us from moving forward because of this underlying fear, creating a mindset of worry. Get it?

So what is it we need to let go of?

We want to let go of our negative thoughts and feelings, so we can live in the present moment. We want to be here right now, not living in the past, or way ahead in the future. Life is precious, and every moment is a gift to let go and feel great.

When you hold onto grudges, painful emotions and past events, these emotions, thoughts and feelings begin to shape the way you respond to life and new situations.

Why do we hold on?

We hold on because it is easier than letting go.

We hold on because it makes us feel in control.

We hold on because letting go is scary and frightening.

We hold on because it keeps us safe from making the same mistakes.

Holding on is a trick your mind does to help you feel in control and safe. The truth is, it doesn’t do you any good. Surrendering and letting go of old emotions, memories and thoughts will support you in living a life full of flow and ease, opposed to anxiety and stagnation. 

Learn how to let go with these steps

1. Release thoughts and keep them moving

Often when we become more “aware” of what is going in our minds, we try so hard to stop thinking negative, that we create more resistance and tension in ourselves than we had before.

Your emotions and feelings are valid and represent situations or scenarios that were or are painful so it is important to acknowledge them.

What we want to do is deal with them in a new way which helps to release tension and suffering.

Acknowledge the scenario, thought, or story, release it and simply let it go on it’s way.

The thoughts come in, and they go out, allowing your mind to stay more relaxed. This awareness will release the energy build up of repetitive thoughts & emotions, so next time the same thought won’t create the same anxiety, anger and fear like it did before, having less power over you.

2. Let go through feeling

You have to feel it in order to heal it.

Feeling painful emotions is very important. Emotions colour our world, and without them our world would be pretty bland. If you don’t acknowledge your feelings by blocking them out or ignoring them, then it will come out in less desirable ways, such as a panic attacks, rage, anger, or running away.

Feel the feeling, release it, and let it go on it’s way.

It is the same tool we use to release thoughts, but instead we are doing it through feeling. Give yourself the time to feel what you are feeling, but don’t keep fueling the fire with the same memory which created the pain in the first place. In this case you need to use both steps 1 and 2 together.

3. Use different techniques and exercises to let go

We are all going to be different in the way we let go. Letting go is a process that needs to practiced, and nurtured on a daily basis for most people. The only way you are going to learn what works for you is through trying different things. Give these techniques and exercises a go and see if they work for you.

Breathing – Dropping down out of your mind into your body, and begin to feel your breath. Feeling your lungs as you breathe in and out, feeling the process of what it is like to breathe without thinking about it. The key here is to feel it.

Yoga is a great way to breathe through different nurturing poses, allowing yourself to feel your body through movement instead of being in your head. This is a way to let go of any tension.

Meditation – Sitting in meditation is one of the best tools you have to let go. If you relax your body, your mind will begin to relax as well. Let go of all of your worries – the need to be perfect, successful, worries about work, family etc. Take the time to let go of your mind, and just be.

Letting go enables you to open your mind up to positive thoughts, different ideas, and to possibility. If you don’t let go of the old same stuff you keep telling yourself, you won’t open up yourself to new energy that enables change and growth.

Make letting go a daily practice and ritual. Meditate daily, or set a time throughout the day when you can check in with yourself to see what you are feeling and thinking. Unfortunately letting go isn’t as easy as a 2 minute microwave meal. If these habits have been around for a long time, then it will take some time to get used to the process. Be easy on yourself, and with each moment of awareness remind yourself to let go.