fbpx

3 Easy Ways to Inject Self-Kindness into Your Life

I want to ask you, how kind are you being towards yourself right now?

If you are anything like me or the 87 women I worked with last month, I guarantee the kindness you have towards yourself could be improved.

Whether you find yourself using your willpower to force yourself to tick off just one more to do. Or you’re beating or punishing yourself for not doing enough. Or you’re constantly telling yourself how you’re not measuring up to others.

It’s time to take a stand for yourself and inject some kindness, or at least try because you deserve better!

The way we are with ourselves comes from our childhood conditioning about who we should be, act and do in the world, and if we aren’t measuring up to that expectation, then we think we’re not enough. This old programming plays out everyday, creating automatic thoughts that don’t serve us, causing us to be far from kind to ourselves.

I bet if you wrote down all the unkind thoughts you told yourself day in day out, you would be shocked!

Imagine if someone told you those things out loud to you? Would you tolerate it? I’m guessing no, so why would you be any different?

3 Easy Tips to Inject Self-Kindness Right Now

Focus on what you have done rather than what you haven’t done

We are wired to focus on what we have not achieved rather than what we have achieved.

Many of us have been taught to think praising our efforts is a form of arrogance or tall poppy syndrome so we don’t do it.

The good thing is you can do it, if you want to and considering this blog is all about injecting self-kindness and changing old habits I’m guessing you’re willing to try.

Instead of focusing on the lack of what you have achieved for the day or week, instead focus on what you have achieved. It sounds like this:

“I only did 3 days of exercise this week instead of 5″ (insert negative feelings here) vs

“I completed 3 days of exercise this week and I felt so energised after it.”

See the difference? Focus on what you have done, rather than the lack of and you will feel inspired to keep doing it!

Embrace “unconditional self-acceptance”

Albert Ellis, the father of Rational Emotive Behaviour Therapy coined this term to refer to the truth that is often missed – we are less than perfect.

That’s right, no human being is perfect you included, sorry to break it to you.

Accepting that you are a less than perfect human being who will at times perform well, but who will also fail and be less than perfect is one of the first steps to self-kindness.

You are the sum of all your parts – the good, bad and ugly. Not just the good ones.

Learn to unconditionally embrace your entire self without being judgemental and self-punishing. Be kind to all parts of you, not just the parts you deem to be good.

Swap mean thoughts for kind ones

In order to swap mean thoughts for kind ones awareness is required. This means becoming aware of what you are telling yourself throughout the day.

What do you say to yourself when you don’t get things perfect? What do you say to yourself when you look at yourself in the mirror? What do you say to yourself when you don’t get all your to-do’s ticked off? What do you say to yourself when you compare yourself to others?

Are these thoughts mean or kind? When you catch mean thoughts, swap it to a kind thought just like this:

Mean thought: “You should’ve done better, you will never be good enough.” vs

Kind thought: “That was a good effort, you are trying your best and that is all that matters.”


Give these tips a go and you will be well on your way to becoming more tolerant, kind, self-compassionate and way less stressed, and you might kick some goals along the way to and remember life is meant to be enjoyed not endured!

Like this article? Share it!

I hope you have enjoyed reading this blog post.

You can browse through my other posts here or if there is a topic you’d like me to write about, please send me a message here!

Rachel